just a little one...

just read the comments and wanted to say....

I'm not saying giving up the gear is easy!! i only said this one weekend has been surprisingly easy?!
And that's because i was mentally prepared for it and Ive had the support! Next weekend when ive been out and had a drink and got hangover from hell i could well be saying that i fucked up? who knows? its one day at a time and the up's and down's that go with it, that's what all this is about?! I still find that sub-consciously it is still going round and round in my head but Ive got to learn not to listen to it?!

It has been my family that have pulled me through this, i would have done it anyway because that's me, but i have had it made a hell of a lot easier because of the support! i appreciate i am lucky! But as with life itself I'm sure I'll get something bad thrown at me at some point through out this.....like when my dad finds out and dis-owns me.......? (that's my one true worry in life?!)

All i could say to anyone who's ever planning on going through this or has a family member who is/was like me... is this:

Read this what i write, Read the comments from Kat&if you know her talk to her about this experience, and look at the comment some-one has left me about her son (the crack/acid addict-clean for 7years) that comment from "a mum" said it all for me... people make mistakes, those who are serious about getting clean will do it, but if theres one thing that i have learnt from all this, its that the love and support of your family will get you through anything in life.

Addicts get to a point where sometimes family and friends do need to turn there back to make them realise the extent of their problem (Craig did it to me) but when they make the steps to change, thats the time to be behind them.
No-body likes to be a disappointment or a failure, regardless, having support is like a lifeline, its a goal to aim for, its an achievement that's possible to achieve and also, most importantly its a life away from the mess your in?

You can't expect an addict to get clean when their only friends in the world are other addicts. No matter how bad they want to be clean if that's all that's around them they will fail. Heroin is so powerful, so controlling and so seductive if you haven't been there you can't really understand the sheer power of it. Its evil in a powder. Even the strongest people succumb to it and get pulled under?

You need to be there for them through the tough time, and the rewards will be so much greater, and chance of relapse is minimal? (its mental & physical hell to withdraw-could a smoker cope if someone else just decided enough was enough and took away their fags? NO! they would go crazy!! that's why it has to be the user that has to be ready!)
No-body aims to become an addict but shit happens. Once upon a time every addict was a newborn baby who everybody loved and was proud to show off, its that nurturing that unconditional loved that could get anybody through the dark times.....don't give up on them completely unless your so so so so sure its the right thing for you to do?

That was deep.......?!

x x x